Tag Archive for: Axis

Teaching to Learn: Realizations

Near the end of this experiment I decided, “You cannot stop now”. So I have developed and remain to nurture that intention, to keep teaching myself through my instructing of others and to allow the others to teach me while I pass along the know-how that I will hopefully continue to gain as I continue to deepen and sharpen my own yoga practice. I plan on teaching a few days each week to friends and family with no expectations of making money only gaining practice and experience. A very honest and humbling realization presented itself to me as I was preparing for this paper, I have grown a great deal. From the first experiment to this last one, from day one to every day since then; It was as though I had planted myself in a garden the day I enrolled in this teacher training program. And with the nourishing hands of the teachers here at Axis and through the encouragement of all the others in the program we have all grown in this garden, into a community of glorious and flourishing pupils who will continue to spread and seed others and their lives with the compassion and nourishment we received here ourselves. I found much more than myself and my potential dharma through this program, I discovered a family of like-minded people that will always have a spot in my heart as I continue now on my own path and they on theirs. I am grateful and blessed for all that I have been taught and for all that I will be able to pass along.

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One Step at a Time

Using Ayurveda and western medicine as a guide, this Axis Yoga Teacher Training student found a path to a healthier body. This student found success in making significant dietary changes by taking it one step at a time. Healthy substitutions were made gradually rather than trying to change everything at once. The end result was a combination of both expected and unexpected accomplishment and a commitment to a healthier future.

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One Step at a Time: Realistic Goals

My initial interest was with the pancha karma process but after my first experiment, I fully acknowledged that I have a tendency to overwhelm myself with challenges as a means of self-punishment.  While this process sounds like something I would like to do in the future, I knew it was above and beyond what I was capable of at that time.   Since the start of the yoga teacher training, I increasingly realized that the current state of my food intake was affecting other portions of my life.  I was so removed from the intake process that I really had no idea what I was putting into my body and in what quantities.  I chose to focus on my food and drink intake due to a recent visit to the doctor when a change in diet was recommended to control my mood swings and emotional sensitivity.

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One Step at a Time: Step One

In recent years, I found myself loading up on a lot of processed foods and diet sodas for periods of time until I would feel awful and sluggish and then I would go through bouts of healthy eating where I would make all of my food at home with no processed or “chemical-ized” foods.  This cycle would continuously repeat itself with no rhyme or reason and very little awareness on my part.  I knew that this was not healthy nor was the amount of diet soda I was taking in.  As my first step in this experiment, I knew I had to cut the diet soda.  I had to face the fact that I was addicted to the caffeine and/or chemicals in Diet Coke.  I really had no idea how much diet soda I was taking in until I said I was not going to drink it.  I sure was surprised when I went through intense caffeine withdrawal.  The withdrawal was so severe; I would liken it to quitting smoking.  I was not pleasant to be around as friends, co-workers, and studio mates discovered.

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One Step at a Time: Step Two

Given that I was so agitated from quitting Diet Coke, I knew I had to include coffee and caffeine so I made quitting as many forms of caffeine as possible part of this process.  I decided that this would be my second step.  I only allowed myself teas and I made sure that the teas I was drinking were either “herbal infusions” that didn’t have tea caffeine or had ginger for the focused feeling I craved from caffeine.  This seemed to take a bit of the edge off but the headaches and mood swings were completely unexpected.  I replaced my desire for carbonation with flavored seltzer waters that seemed to curb my grumpiness a bit.  I also increased my water intake to at least 50 ounces of water a day.  As I am not a huge water drinker, I planned on aiming at the 50-ounce mark with the hopes of making it to 100 ounces daily in the next month.

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One Step at a Time: Step Three

For my third step, I decided to compare the food choices for kapha and the list that was given to me by my doctor and I made up a list of what I could eat.  From there, I chose recipes that included those items and set up a diet plan I could follow.  Unfortunately, I soon realized that I was rationalizing delays in implementing this new diet.  I put myself back a week starting this process because of what I explained away as the agitation from quitting diet sodas and caffeine.  After sabotaging this process of my experiment day after day, I decided that I needed some self-reflection to determine why I was throwing up barricades and excuses in this portion of the experiment.  After some deep introspection, I realized that I had an inherent opposition to referring to this portion of the experiment as a “diet”, a word I detest.  I also fostered a deep-seated justification to eating what I deemed to be comfort, “single girl” food, an interconnected relationship from mindless eating when I was in college and while I was single.  I had to change my internal dialogue to view this as a meal plan, not a diet.  I also had to challenge my view of processed food as comfort food and try to break the desire to maintain that interconnected relationship I had built.

After this breakthrough, I immediately went to the store to begin this portion of the experiment.  While this portion of the process has proven to be the most difficult for me and I haven’t followed the meal plan to the letter, my dietary habits have improved considerably.  I had an epiphany once the caffeine withdrawals had ceased that this portion of the process could be just as successful as the first two steps by selecting unhealthy items in my meal repertoire and phasing them out gradually but consciously replacing them with a healthy substitute.  I found that giving myself permission to tackle one issue at a time made this experiment easier and more realistic for future maintenance.

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One Step at a Time: Step Four

I also began abhyanga during this process as step four.  I was intrigued by the idea of a daily morning massage because my rational was who wouldn’t want to feel like they started their day with a massage.  The first issue I ran into was the smell of the sesame oil that I initially purchased in the cooking oil aisle.  There was a burned smell that made this process repellant the first day.  I transferred over to the sesame oil in the cosmetic area.  It was later suggested to me that I might try cold pressed, unrefined sesame oil but I am waiting until I am done with my current bottle of oil. I am notoriously not a morning person and my sleeping patterns varied widely on any given day.  After about a week of step four, I found that I would go to bed early so I could easily get up early to complete the abhyanga and not feel rushed.  I also realized that I was waking up more easily (sometimes without the aid of an alarm) and less resentfully.  I looked forward each morning and was delighted to engage in this practice.  There was a whole ritual of waking up, putting the kettle on, relaxing in bed until the kettle’s light whistle would start and heating the sesame oil. This process was definitely the highlight of my day.

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One Step at a Time: Accomplishments

I felt that my experiment was not as concise as I would have ideally hoped but the issues that I addressed in this experiment were items that I had long ignored.  I have managed to cut caffeine out entirely of my food intake along with the chemicals I was ingesting from the Diet Coke.  My withdrawal symptoms have disappeared and my agitation level has dropped drastically.  My water intake has increased to about 50-75 ounces per day.  The level of difficulty that I had starting the meal modification step surprised me the most.  I couldn’t believe how resentful I was of this portion of the experiment.  I feel like my success rate in this area was about 60%-40%.  I would like to get it up to Susan’s ideal of 80%-20% and am hopeful that with continued focus, I will be able to achieve this goal.  The abhyanga was a smashing success and provided the additional results of smoothing my extremely dry skin, decreasing caffeine withdrawal agitation in the morning, and made waking something to look forward to.  My next goal in the continuation of this experiment is twofold.  I would like to focus on eating more vegetables and fruits while reducing my bread intake.  I would also like to integrate two additional self-care items into my morning routine:  tongue scraping and swishing.

 

 

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The Truth Which Equals Love

Satya, one of the yamas of Yoga, is a self-restraint of truth and honesty. This Axis YTT student simplified an over-booked schedule in order to have the time to look within. By being introspective this student was able to be honest with the Self. By creating stillness, questions that had been avoided through ceaseless action could be addressed.

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The Truth Which Equals Love: Satya

With the yama/niyama experiment creeping up on me, I was doing my best to figure out what was “wrong” with me so I could come up with a life changing experiment.  I wanted to experience something that would unlock the key to my existence and allow me to make major life changes.  The only drawback was that I had no clue what I wanted to address.  It felt really overwhelming until former students came in to talk about their experiences.  Two students spoke about their experiments and their experiences really resonated with me and led me to the satya group.  I determined that my satya experiment would be about my willingness to be truthful to myself.

I realized that for the past few years I have been constantly on the go, always doing something, running from one activity to the next with very little time allotted for myself.  I continually overloaded myself with obligations to friends, acquaintances, my job, my ceramic studio (something that I love), even obligations to a bucket list I recently started.  I was bogged down with so many activities that I agreed to or “needed” to do, I found myself getting stressed and lashing out at others for activities that I volunteered for.  I was less effective in these activities and my daily life because I overloaded myself.  This was making me extremely unhappy.

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