I felt like I was failing. I just couldn’t make myself eat warm food any longer. When I expressed my concerns in class, Beth and Susan suggested I might not be as vata as I had thought. Susan took my pulse and said the left side was vata and the right side was pitta. It seems that I was aggravating my pitta side while trying to pacify my vata side. Susan suggested room temperature food rather than hot and almond oil rather than sesame … so I tried again.
Tag Archive for: ayurveda
The almond oil smells better than the sesame, so I was pretty happy about that change. The room temperature food was not as unappealing and I managed to get it down. After a couple of days I started eating mostly hot foods again without even noticing. Now hot food is what I want almost all the time and it seems to be making me feel warmer. My skin is just as soft as it was with the sesame oil.
My thought on what changed in my desire for cold food is that the sesame oil was just too warming for me. If I have more pitta than I thought, that makes sense, just like Beth and Susan said. It’s amazing how oil on the outside of your body can change so drastically what is happening inside your body. Though I will continue to struggle with balancing my vata and pitta, I feel like I am on the right track. This experiment, if nothing else, helped me to better understand what my true dosha is. One day maybe I will fell like my vata isn’t raging out of control. I’m not sure I have it totally correct yet, but baby steps are always better than no steps!
The experiments students conduct in the Axis Yoga Teacher Training program can be enlightening and even life-changing. And sometimes life unexpectedly changes on a student during an experiment. Following is an account of one student’s experience with this during the Ayurveda portion of the training.
Om Asato Maa Sad-Gamaya
Tamaso Maa Jyotir-Gamaya
Mrtyor-Maa Amrtam Gamaya
Om Shaantih Shaantih Shaantih
From the un-self/un-reality lead me to the self.
From darkness/ignorance lead me to light/spiritual awakening.
From death/fear of death lead me to immortality/knowledge of immortality.
From the moment I first read this mantra, I was immediately drawn to its application in my yoga practice and life. Given that Ayurveda involves lifestyle changes, I thought how appropriate that I choose the Asato ma as the mantra to guide me and lead me through this experiment. Since 2008ish, I have suffered with migraine headaches. Before moving out to Denver from the Washington, D.C. area, I would get them maybe a few times a week. Now, I get migraines so often, that I begin my day with three Advil or Tylenol, so as not to have to take the migraine medication prescribed to me that make me drowsy. I began this experiment wanting to try any and everything that could provide me with relief from this pain. I thought certainly this is not my true self and in fact feels more like darkness and death. After speaking with Beth and Susan, I realized that perhaps the migraines are connected to my diet. Fortunately, for me, Susan is being trained in Tibetan Cranial and offered to provide this form of intervention as an adjunct to my experiment. I was excited and ready to start. At first, I thought I would start this journey with a three day cleanse, followed by almost two weeks of gluten-free and vegetarian eating, and end each day with a 30-minute asana practice and 15 minute prayanam practice. When possible, I wanted to schedule sessions with Susan to track the effect of the treatment and the incorporation of more ayurvedic practices into my life. I braced myself in knowing that more than likely I would not see immediate changes, but something in my “self” was telling me that I was headed in the right direction.
Right before starting the experiment, I was given a glimpse of the powerful nature of the mantra, when I discovered my boyfriend of the past three years was cheating on me. The stress of dealing with that, initially, gave me the cleanse I was wanting, as I could not eat anything really for a few days. Instead of practicing asana and prayanam every night for the following week or so, I managed to fit in practice when I remembered to exist. I felt as though I were going through the motions (e.g., work, being a mother, etc.) and was not fully present, which is the complete opposite of yoga. I kept resisting the urge of my being to look inside for comfort and instead buried myself in distractions. I could not face what my life was presenting. Despite this, I managed to fit in three Tibetan cranial sessions with Susan and felt relief immediately after the treatment. In fact, for two days, I noticed I did not start my day with a migraine. Then came the move out of the house I just moved into the beginning of September. The dream house with the yard, close to Washington Park, space for Ahenei, quiet and friendly neighborhood house into a small apartment in the manufactured neighborhood of Stapleton. On Monday, I had a session with Susan that initially staved off the migraine, but as soon as I arrived to work, hit me like a freight train. Tuesday, good morning Ms. Migraine, Wednesday, we met again, and Thursday was no different. In fact, before class, I have found myself being angry in that when I practice yoga I am forced to look inside and that is the last thing I want to look at right now.
Overall, I did not begin the experiment thinking that I would have a life changing experience; however, that is exactly what I got. From the un-self lead me to self. From darkness lead me to light. From death lead me to immortality. I do not know if this is intentional or not however the translation does not put “the” before self, rather simply states “self” as if to say there are selves in a very worldly sense and a self in a universal sense. I want to connect to self, but fear what preconceived notions/beliefs I will have to lay to rest in order to meet myself. This experiment did not turn out as I had imagined and hoped, but I am ready to wake up from this never-ending nightmare of an existence so inextricably linked to what I see rather than what I feel and know to be True.
Om Shaantih Shaantih Shaantih
Axis Yoga Teacher Training students learn about Ayurveda as part of the comprehensive Axis program. Students then have the opportunity to implement Ayurvedic principles into their daily routine. Some brave students, like the one below, dive into the Ayurveda portion by experimenting with a full panchakarma (cleanse).
When I read that Ayurveda would be part of our syllabus at Axis Yoga, I was so excited. I didn’t really know anything about Ayurveda, but I was thrilled to learn. As with all things Yoga, the more I learned, the more questions I had. But still, I wanted to know what Ayurveda had to offer me. To find that out I must know my Dosha.
At the beginning it seemed as if I may be Tri-doshic. So again, more questions. If I’m Tri-doshic, how do I know what is a balanced symptom of one Dosha versus an unbalanced symptom of a different Dosha. Instead of looking at the Doshas and their qualities, I decided to look at the unbalanced symptoms of each Dosha and see what looked familiar to me. Again, I was across the board, I had imbalances associated with all three Doshas. I had read about the Panchakarma in our required reading and it seemed like a good way to balance everything in one shot and maybe shed some light on my Dosha situation.
Upon reading about the Panchakarma it didn’t seem that difficult a cleanse to execute. I have done cleanses before, namely the Master Cleanse, and I thought I could sail through this one with ease. But, I was wrong. Ghee was my initial choice for my internal and external oleation. My first attempt with the ghee internal oleation was horrific. It made me gag and the smell was more than I could bare, but I persevered. I continued this morning ritual with a ghee oil pull and tongue scraping for the first three days as prescribed.
On the fourth day I discontinued the internal oleation and replaced it with the external oleation. I also began eating the monodiet of kicheree on this day. Even though I was no longer drinking the ghee, but massaging myself with it before showering, the smell was too much! All day I would burp ghee, everything smelled like butter and not in a good way. I felt as though I were made of the stuff! On the fifth day of my cleanse I woke up with a strange but minor red spot on my chest. After my shower it was a huge red streak headed for my heart. It forked off in two directions and my first thought was that I had some strange infection. So I emailed a picture to our amazing Ayurvedic instructors asking if I should be concerned. As I looked at it it didn’t seem to look all that much like an infection so I settled down. It was concluded that this heat induced spot, over the lymph on my left side was Pitta provoked Ama being released via my skin.
Now I had some indication of what Dosha I needed to be dealing with. I started to adjust my cleanse toward relieving Pitta. I changed on the sixth day from using ghee for oleation and oil pulls to coconut oil. Oh what a relief! The coconut oil tasted and smelled so much better, it was amazing! It was so much better in fact that I started to massage with it after my shower, it was that much more tolerable to me. In addition to the oil pulling, tongue scraping and external oleation I was drinking Triphala tea with added Fenugreek (more than recommended:) I love how the fenugreek tastes). I found all of these things to be very tolerable and continue them on a regular basis since the end of the Panchakarma. From days four through nine I continued with the monodiet also, this was not tolerable.
I consider myself a fairly accomplished cook and my kicheree turned out horrible. In reality it probably wasn’t horrible it was just dry and sticky, it tasted fine. I really enjoyed it a couple of times with added cilantro (for Pitta) and ginger. But then I got bored with it and almost found it easier to not eat. I would go through phases when I wouldn’t consider putting most food into my body to considering eating a french fry off the sidewalk. A couple of times I had vegetable broth or fruit juice to ease my way, I admit. It was harder than I anticipated eating the same thing all day for several days in a row.
On the second to last day I drank a few teaspoons of castor oil instead of doing the Basti, per the recommendation of our esteemed teachers. I don’t know which would have been worse. I won’t say much here other than it worked.