Tag Archive for: Teacher

Study of the Yoga Sutras: Niyama Experiment

Addition of Niyama to Experiment
A week or so into the yama Experiment, we were invited to begin another Experiment with one of the niyamas, the individual observances, outlined in Patanjali’s Yoga Sutras.  Ishvara Pranidhana is one of these niyamas and is often translated as surrender (or devotion) to Ishvara or God.   At a very early age, I opted out of organized religion due to its exclusionary nature and history of abuses.   It also seemed that God could easily be a human construct that gives us the certainty, permanence and ‘truth’ that we crave.  Again, being rather practical, this background made it easy for me to step onto the nonreligious (albeit spiritual) path of yoga.  However, according to Patanjali’s Sutras, Ishvara Pranidhana brings perfection in samadhi or freedom (II.45).    With my rejection that the Gods of Western religions were the exclusive be all and end all of ‘God’, where was I left in terms of the yogic path?  To probe deeper into this question, it made sense to add Ishvara Pranidhana to my Experiment.  And, I decided it made most sense to start with an inquiry into how the applicable Sutras defined Ishvara, God, and find out where that would lead in terms of insights and practices.

Sutra Review
In the Sutras, Patanjali provides a different description of Ishvara, God, from the anthropomorphized images of my Catholic upbringing.  In Chapter I of the Sutras, as elucidated by Baba Hari Dass, Ishvara is depicted as a special purusha (I.24), not touched by afflictions, and in that there is the seed of limitless omniscience (I.25), which is not limited by time and is the teacher of all teachers (I.26), with Om being the word denoting Ishvara (I.27).  Then we are told that constant repetition of Om and meditation on its meaning [are surrender to God] (I.28), and from this practice, Ishvara Pranidhana, consciousness turns inward, realization [of the Self] occurs, and obstacles are overcome.  Zeal in practice and self study are the other acts of Yoga that reduce afflictions and, with Ishvara Pranidhana, lead to samadhi (II.1 and 2).

Reflection and Insights
Certainly I have felt the beautiful stillness and sense of oneness arising from chanting Om and meditating.  Given this experience, it is inviting to adopt Patanjali’s form of Ishvara as ‘God’.  But could this stillness merely be a consequence of the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems coming into a balanced state – or some other very predictable physical cause and effect- without more i.e., Ishvara?  After all, brain scans are now capable of tracking the physical changes occurring in the brains of meditators.  Yet, these intellectual debates produce no answers, just more questions since we are inherently limited by the human form from which we are analyzing the questions.  Instead, using Patanjali’s definition of Ishvara Pranidhana, namely, surrender to God through meditation and chanting Om, I experience something which brings my mind to stillness and in that stillness, my being opens to something greater than this individual wave of humanness.   And, with ease, I am able to set aside the brain games and surrender to this oneness.  Certainly, there will be times when I wrestle with ideas around God and surrender, but the experiment produced a surprisingly gentle shift in my perspective.  As to reincarnation, while I am not convinced reincarnation is anything other than a creation to justify caste systems, merely pondering the possibility of reincarnation takes me to a broader view than this one form and one moment of existence, and for that I am both grateful and intrigued.

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Study of the Yoga Sutras: Conclusion

Closing Thoughts
It is sweet to have zero balances on my email accounts.  And, these two precepts, aparigraha and Ishvara Pranidhana, led me to reflect on the loftier concepts of reincarnation, the yogic path, and naturally, Ishvara or God.  Knowing my tendencies, there will be tension between dealing with day to day pressures and keeping the basic questions of life (or lives) and Ishvara Pranidhana in the forefront of my choices.  With conviction to live with consciousness and adherence to yogic practices, hopefully, I will hold this tension with awareness and detachment.  As Pattabi Jois said so often, “Practice and All Will Come”.

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Yama and Niyama Experiment Leads to Action and Healing

Each teacher training student at Axis Yoga completes an experiment with a specific yama (restraint) and niyama (observance). Applying aparigraha (non-hoarding) and sauca (cleanliness) to this student’s life allowed her the space to heal. And a new sense of action moving forward.

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Action and Healing: Introduction

What started off as a simple experiment for a class has turned into healing. When presented with this idea of choosing a “yama” and “niyama” to see if I’d notice any changes/differences/movement the concept was exciting, mostly because I like projects and enjoy a challenge. Ultimately, I chose to take on aparigraha (non-hoarding) as my yama and sauca (cleanliness) as my niyama. I recall choosing aparigraha because I immediately identified non-hoarding as something tangible, as in having a garage or closets full of unused stuff. Of course it made the most sense to choose this for me because, well, spring cleaning was right around the corner anyhow and what a fabulous way to get a jump start, right? Then it came time to choose a niyama and while I like a challenge, the crunch with work and taking this course was a challenge in and of itself through time alone, so I chose what seemed to go hand in hand – non-hoarding and cleanliness.  Initially, I thought aparigraha would help me rid of crap in my closets and by choosing sauca, I’d keep them clean; and I would feel better, my home would be cleaner, I would be happier, and so would my family. I found journaling to be the most useful to record any changes, differences, or movement. The journey:

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Action and Healing: the Journey

During week one I turned grumpy and I suspect it was due to the fact that I was going to need to make movement in a way that I knew would nudge me to think of stuff I’ve hoarded physically and/or emotionally. I had planned to do the smaller closets with all the coats and towels. However, what I wound up doing was finish painting the trim in the house because in November of 2010 we did some renovations to our home and the trim was the very last of that long overdue list of things to complete and these “to do items” had been gnawing at me since and also because once I chose to clean out the big closet with all the old college papers and stuff that I had accumulated throughout the years I began to feel anxious. What it all boiled down to: I was avoiding.

In week two I mustered up enough energy to tackle the closet. I wound up having two great big bins and two rather large boxes full of old college papers and notebooks. I held on to every single piece of paper through bachelor’s and master’s degrees. I found the task to be tedious and daunting. It was an all day project and by day’s end I was exhausted and relieved. I had done plenty of reflection in my life to know that the reason I held on to all those papers was because I had a profound incident occur when I was a fifth grader. Ms. Elder, who was my teacher at the time, had told me that college was “not a place for young ladies like [me].” This response followed a question I had for her which was, “What is college?” At the time I was growing up in a ghetto in southern California and she was working in it so perhaps it was the only response she knew to give. It was the height of the gang wars and not a lot of hope was had in the community as drugging and thieving were the norm. In retrospect, I see why she said what she said but I held onto it for so long (in a negative way). She was the first person I thought of the first time I ever stepped foot on a college campus and for many years her words were part of my impetus to “get out.” After the ridding of the bins and boxes, I thank her.

In week three and week four, I’ve made a complete spring cleaning check list and have chipped away at it. Now granted I’ve hired someone (a young mother with a baby and a need for diaper money) to help with some of it and it seems like movement in a good way is happening. I’m able to sit content with the way our home looks and knowing that when I open my closets I will no longer find myself in a rush to close them. More importantly my body does not get heated when I think of Ms. Elder. I’ve forgiven her and myself. I think it was time, twenty-six years of holding onto all of that energy was long.

Since the cleaning out of things it my world seems a bit less stuffy. My body feels lighter. My energy is greater and my outlook is positive. While it has not been a complete transformation of any kind, it has certainly challenged me to look at some things that needed not linger any longer. My heart doesn’t feel so compressed and my space is clean!

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Action and Healing: Conclusion

Sauca continues to be that idea that encourages me to maintain my space, my body, and my heart. The other day I realized that my car was a disaster and so I made it a point to clean it out because my normal and natural is to put things off until the eleventh hour. However, that is my whole point of this experiment and the manner in which it has impacted me: what was once a mere thought of doing something or making movement in one direction has turned into action. This path of yoga is an awesome way of life. I’ve always been a gentle spirit; I just didn’t always conduct myself in a way that exemplified that. Sometimes my roots have a tendency to make their appearance known and yoga has been a great guide to remind me that as a human being, I’m responsible for what shines through in my canopy; this week it’s forgiveness.

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A Shift of Attitude and Energy through Satya and Tapas

Axis Yoga Teacher Training students strengthen their knowledge of the yamas (restraints) and niyamas (observances) by choosing one of each to experiment with in their own lives. By focusing satya (truthfulness) and tapas (austerity) to a very specific area of his life, this student found the benefits of taking control of how other people’s actions affect him.

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A Shift of Attitude and Energy: Satya

We all like to believe that we are truthful. However, there are countless facets to this precept. I narrowed my study to the aspect of being honest, or true to myself. Then narrowed it even further to an aspect of my life that I have struggled with for years: my job. In my job I am faced with multitudes of situations that I am personally and ethically opposed to on a very deep level. These situations ultimately make me feel like I am not living my truth. I work in a hospital, in direct care with patients…people. I work alongside doctors, nurses, case managers, therapists, and numerous other staff members responsible for some level of patient care. On any given day, I would literally run out of fingers to count how many negative, speculative, ignorant, and sometimes simply cruel comments I hear regarding patients…people. They are usually centered around the “choices” that a patient has made in their life that has led them to the sad destiny of needing medical attention. Often, the favorite subjects of these commentaries are: 1) alcoholics and drug addicts, 2).psychiatric patients, and 3) bariatric, or very overweight, patients. The commentaries often include a statement like, “How could anybody ever ______!” I’ve even heard such blatantly cruel statements as, “What an idiot.” This was a comment from a doctor regarding an alcoholic. Another comment, “How stupid…” was from another doctor, regarding a 23 year-old who nearly overdosed on prescription pain medicine. I have actually heard a nurse refer to an overweight woman as “disgusting”. She was not referring to something that came out of the patient, but the actual person. Over the years, I have become somewhat desensitized to this type of banter among so-called professionals, simply because it is so prevalent. However, I am still amazed and appalled at the complete lack of compassion from healthcare professionals who are trained and paid to care for others. As much as I love certain aspects of my work, I am deeply affected by this overt dispassion for humanity. It leaves me feeling as though I am being untrue to myself, to allow myself to work in this climate everyday. It also leaves me questioning humanity, itself.

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A Shift of Attitude and Energy: Tapas

I chose Tapas as my Niyama.  I have seen Tapas defined as, “passion, or zeal for yoga”.    I practiced sadhana every day for 15-45 minutes – first, pranayama, then meditation.  I also practiced asana, when I had the time.  I diligently got up between 4:30 and 5:00am on work days, around 6:00am on non-work days.  I practiced before sunrise, while my space was still relatively silent.

I noticed immediately that I was able to disengage, personally and emotionally, from these situations.  It was as though I was a passive observer in a protective “bubble”, not allowing the emotionality of the situation to affect me.  It may seem as though I was becoming dispassionate, but that was not the case.  I was able to observe the situation without allowing it to enter into my being.  It was still just as disturbing, but I did not internalize it and carry it with me.  I was able to disengage both passively and actively, especially when a co-worker would deliberately try to engage me in a conversation about a patient that was not pertinent to my direct involvement in that patient’s care.  Frequently someone would even start talking to me about a patient whom I did not even know.  In these situations, instead of engaging in the conversation, or even listening, I would consciously and graciously excuse myself and walk away.  This process seemed to happen organically.  I did not have a plan or intention for how it was going to unfold.  It was amazing!  It was as though I had discovered some beautiful secret that had lay dormant in me for years!

I have noticed a remarkable shift in both my attitude and energy at work.  Where I used to leave work virtually every day emotionally drained, I now feel like I have my emotions and my energy intact when I walk out the door.  Where I’ve thought that it was my patients who were sapping my prana, it turns out it is my co-workers.  I realize that, although I cannot change how other people think, act or speak, I can change how I allow it to affect me.

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Greater Connection of Mind and Body through Brahmacharya and Santosha

Axis Yoga encourages its teacher training students to understand yoga’s yamas (restraints) and niyamas (observances) through real-life application. This student explores the application of Brahmacharya (continence) in the modern American world and how it applies to his individual situation. He also finds greater overall connection of body and mind through his focus on Santosha (contentment).

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