Attachment to people has also made me a prideful person and perhaps fearful in some respects. I concern myself with their well being and don’t want to let them down. I make sure I don’t disappoint them by showing up for them even if it disrupts my own life or isn’t in my best interest. They want me there, I show up. I am reliable and I take great pride in it. I know that sometimes people take advantage of that but I am okay with it because I want to be there for them and it feels like a selfless act, which I suppose makes me feel good about myself. Okay, so it’s probably not a good thing. I suppose I will have to learn how to say no to people, I think that will be a really freeing thing to learn how to do. However, I think I will have to start out really small. I think it will be difficult because I have been the ‘yes’ girl for so long.
I realize now why I didn’t want to start this experiment, I have so many things I need to work on. Even though I don’t have many physical or material attachments any longer, I have a plethora of other attachments I need to work on. However, by becoming aware of them, I am more able to release myself from those attachments. This experiment was incredibly helpful and I will use it as motivation to begin learning how I can become less attached to people