Replacing Unhealthy Habits: Obstacles

By the following Sunday I was confused. I didn’t know what I was supposed to be feeling or thinking. I hadn’t had any “aha moments”. I didn’t feel enlightened or powerful. I felt…normal-ish. I think I let the doubt take over and by Tuesday I hadn’t done my morning asana in three days. My mind became overwhelmed with daily stuff like getting to the bank and finding a place to live. I made excuses in my head, “oh well this is the only day to go to the bank and you can do it for thirty minutes tomorrow”. I was craving chocolate and Starburst and cupcakes. Wednesday, thirteen days after not drinking, no caffeine, no red meat or going out I said to myself “ you deserve a drink, you haven’t had one in thirteen days and well work is hard and you had a bad week with the bank and three doubles at work”. I did, I sat at the bar after work and I had two beers and two shots. FAIL! I felt like crap in the morning, I didn’t do my morning practice yet again. “This is what I’m talking about Hannah. What is it worth? Did you really have THAT much fun?” I thought to myself. The answer is NO.
I hadn’t done asana consistently and I had a night of drinking, I obviously am not doing this experiment to the best of my ability. Since that night I have had plenty more excuses not do my daily practice, and you know what they say about excuses?