Let Go of Expectations: of Past
Even though I accomplished practicing every day, it did not come without its struggles. The most notable one being getting up in the morning. I made a point to get to bed earlier but I still struggled. I did fine getting up the first couple of days and then it started getting harder for me. I would wake up tired and I just wanted to stay in bed a little bit longer. The next thing I struggled with was letting go of the “interesting experience” I had experienced previously. I had not only began to expect having those experiences but I wanted to have those experiences. I enjoyed them and had placed some spiritual significance onto them. I worked to let that expectation go because that is not what meditation is about and I don’t want to be attached to it that way. But it is hard for me to let it go because to me those experiences were very enjoyable and a part of me thinks if I do not have those experiences I am not meditating correctly. I do not know why I have that belief but that belief is there. So for this experiment I wanted it to be okay with myself to just sit and be knowing that that was enough. I am still working on that.