Deepening Connection Journal Entries (Con’t)

We had unexpected house guests, including two 5 year-old twins.  I felt drained and overwhelmed almost the entire time that we had to do this assignment.  I viewed it as an opportunity to learn more about what it is that I needed to “learn” and found out that I am not  taking enough time to find the divine in the every day, meditating enough, focusing on what is right, existing intentionally within the chaos.  This became my mantra – exist calmly and     intentionally within the chaos –  particularly applied towards my relationship with my husband and the divine – and of course, with myself as well.

After many discussions with my husband about Bramacharaya, we discovered a tremendous amount of information.  Particularly that many of the other yamas and neyamas are also called  into focus and that as we focus on increasing the intentionality of our time and space together, we must also attend to other priorities as they arise.  I am realizing that many areas of my life are affected by what seems to be a narrow focus – by focusing on Bramacharaya, many other aspects of my life are being affected.  It feels as if I am lifting the “rock” of my life and seeing all the worms and bugs squiggle around.  At first glance, it’s gross and overwhelming, but then when you look long enough, you recognize that they’re just bugs and that there is some kind of divine intelligence to the life under the rock and feel better about it knowing it’s there.  In my personal case, I’d continue on the path of creating the life that my husband and I want through the development of a lifestyle that is pure, loving, intentional and includes the divine within.