Three weeks ago, sitting in class I was struggling with the decision of which yama/niyama group to choose. After listening to the mentors discuss their experiences I was moved and excited to begin my own journey. However, felt this was something I would carry with me much longer than three weeks, rendering the decision a difficult one. Nevertheless, as I listened to the last mentor discuss Ishvara Pranidhan I felt my heart gravitating toward this experiment group almost automatically. Just like that, I had chosen to surrender to God.
In the beginning, it was a little difficult to formulate my experiment. I started thinking of why Ishvara Pranidhan was an obvious choice and how I could apply it in my life appropriately. Currently my life is in a bit of a transitional state. Having recently moved to a new state I am searching for work in a difficult market and preparing to apply to an extremely competitive internship program. I find these situations frustrating because no matter how much I plan and prepare I have no control over the outcome. What’s more, I consider myself a super planner. I like to have a clear plan in life, which typically transcends into enjoying the security of controlled situations. I think planning can be good to a degree, when it helps you to stay organized. However, the downfall is I often find myself trying to over-plan or control a situation that I have essentially had no control over. Therefore, I waste valuable time wondering, worrying, and becoming wrapped up in situations that may or may not happen. Which overall, results in not being present or valuing the given moments of the here and now.
After reflecting on this realization, I decided that if I surrender things beyond my control to God, then I will have more peace and it will allow me to be present in my life.